NewCity Church Meets Ronald McDonald!

On September 6th, another group of fabulous women made dinner at the Ronald McDonald House in Aurora. We made Spaghetti and Salad for the residents at the house. It was a wonderful night, and the women were so helpful and giving! It was a little easier to go into the house for Ross, the memories of Kelly were strong, but not so sad. I had a great time getting to know the women a little better, and I think they had a good time serving others. Many thanks to the women from NEWCITY Church: Dana and her lovely daughter, Kristen, Ronnie, and Aurora, and also my family and friends: Joanne and Terri Dana and HER wonderful daughter, and special thanks to my dear friend Juli, who got there early with me and stayed late to finish the cleanup. It was another wonderful night for me, and Kelly and her family remain close in my hearts and prayers! I will post pictures soon...

My Marathon Story - "I Said Yes"

The early morning air brushed against my arms and a chill went through my spine. The air seemed to crack with anticipation and promise. My husband and I boarded the bus that would take us through the dessert city of Phoenix, Arizona to the start line of my very first marathon. My emotions were rolling over me like waves, I was bubbling with excitement one moment, and trembling with fear the next. This was the biggest physical and mental challenge I had ever faced, and I was hoping that I could prevail.

I decided to walk a marathon ten months earlier in March, during a church retreat in Buena Vista, Colorado. I was a new member of a very energetic and enthusiastic church, and this was my first retreat. We were in the chapel and the minister told us to pray and ask God to guide us and use us as his vessel. I closed my eyes, took deep breaths, and prayed. Then the most ridiculous idea popped into my head.

“You should do a marathon for Kelly!”

“O.K.”, I thought, I must not be doing this right! I am supposed to be getting spiritually enlightened! Shaking my head to clear away the insanity, I tried again. I took deep breaths, closed my eyes, and sent up sincere prayers and thoughts. Focus, I told myself, focus! The image of me finishing a marathon, arms over my head in victory came into my vision. The chorus was singing a song that was called “I said Yes”, which was all about saying Yes to Christ. I was vigorously shaking my head no. I did not want to do a marathon! I was hoping that this whole idea wasn’t coming directly from God, but from my own subconscious. Either way, I didn’t want to do it. I had been on the sidelines of too many of my husband Ross’s marathons to actually want to do one. I saw firsthand how much dedication and determination it took to train for a marathon. I had seen too many people racked with pain and in tears because they were not going to finish.

Ross started doing marathons seven years earlier for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. The L.L.S. has a program for marathoners called Team in Training near our home in Denver, Colorado. The concept is simple, the runners raise $3,000 and TNT will train you week by week and get you across the finish line. They also pair the runners with a patient honoree, someone that you can run for and draw inspiration from during the grueling training miles. Ross had finished 9 marathons and raised over $30,000 to find a cure for blood cancers by the time of my weekend retreat. My husband’s first patient honoree was a 9-year-old girl named Kelly Grubb. She lived in Montana and so the Team in Training support team encouraged him to contact Kelly by email and phone to chat with her and hear her story. Ross is typically very reserved and introverted, but one evening he just picked up the phone and called Kelly. I was astounded that the conversation seemed to be morphing into more than the normal superficial talk that strangers usually have. Ross later told me that he and Kelly just seemed to be connected right from the start.

We learned about the entire Grubb family through Kelly’s mom, Patty. Patty would send emails detailing all aspects of Kelly’s cancer journey. The most touching emails were the one’s that she sent in the middle of the night when she wrestled with the possibility of having to give up her child to God and how hard that would be for her. She spoke of Job’s trials in the bible and would draw strength from these stories. I would sit with tears streaming down my face, reading her emails. I felt as if I knew exactly what they were going through. I could imagine the fear, the terror of watching your own innocent child having to withstand the painful procedures and the sickness of cancer. What I couldn’t believe was the strength that this family showed, the way they found joy in everyday moments, and mostly the way the praised God everyday. This was a kind of faith that I have never witnessed and it touched me deeply. Over the next seven years we became extremely close to the entire Grubb family, and it was the witness of their faith that had drawn me to the church.

All weekend long during the retreat, I couldn’t stop thinking about doing a marathon. I was extremely out of shape and seriously doubted that I even could do one if I wanted to. When I returned home, I laughingly told my family about my experience. To my surprise, they all said that I should do it! “Do you think I can?” I asked nervously. “Yes, I am sure that you can”, Ross answered. He did a quick search and found out that the next marathon for the L.L.S. was Jan. 9^th 2005. “That’s Kelly’s birthday!” I shouted! “It’s a sign!” my daughter Laura said, laughingly! I decided that if I could walk ten miles in under 2 ½ hours by the end of August, I would sign up. I tentatively said Yes!

Ross wrote out a pre-training schedule for me. It looked ridiculously easy, starting out at just 30 minutes, five days a week. I was shocked to discover that I was unable to walk on a treadmill more than 30 minutes at a time. When I got off the treadmill, I was lightheaded and my legs felt like rubber. I had serious doubts that I would be able to do a marathon. Ross said that consistency is what mattered, so I kept with it, never missing a workout. Before long, I was able to walk for an hour, and then two! My confidence slowly began to rise. I began to pray during my walks, thanking God for my many blessings and always saying a prayer for Kelly and her family. I began to be thankful for simple things, like the beautiful sunrises and sunsets that I barely noticed before my training walks. I was conscious of my health and my ability to walk in a new and profound way. Walking became a spiritual meditation for me and not just a workout.

Throughout my training Ross would surprise me with new running clothes and sophisticated watches that would keep track of my splits. Soon we were having conversations about hydration and drill workouts. By August, I was able to walk ten miles in 2 hours 15 minutes. I was ready to start my ‘real’ training and we went to the local Runner’s Roost store to sign up for the marathon.

Once I started my training with the L.L.S. coaches and other participants, I began to understand why Ross was so hooked. My walking coach was Peggy, and she and I would walk for hours and hours, talking most of the way. Her Mom died of cancer, and she was a dedicated volunteer to the L.L.S. She gave me tips and tricks that even my husband didn’t know, and I was proud each week with my progress. The training program is based on gradually increasing your miles each week. Your body adapts astonishingly well to the increased demands as long as you don’t skip workouts. The most challenging workout that I had was my 18-mile training walk. I was by myself, walking on a dirt trail that traverses through the city for miles called the Highline Canal. The portion that I was walking on was tree lined and beautiful, cutting through a very up-scale neighborhood. I usually enjoyed gawking at the beautiful houses and landscaping, but that day when I started out the trail was snow covered. The temperature rose steadily throughout the morning and soon the trail was slippery with mud. I plodded through the miles, the sludge sucking at my feet and thought I would never finish. My thighs were burning and sore and I was battling an inner enemy that was whispering things like, “You can’t do this”, and “What were you thinking?” When I saw my car at the trailhead, tears streamed down my face. I was mentally and physically exhausted and couldn’t have gone one more step. I hoped the marathon wouldn’t be as hard as that! The longest training run that the program calls for is 20 miles, and that one went much better for me. The weather was cool and crisp and I felt great at the end. It gave me a much needed confidence boost.

My family and I arrived in Phoenix the day before the marathon on Jan 8th, 2005. It was nice to be away from the cold weather that we were having in Denver. It was the PF Chang’s Rock and Roll Marathon, and I was looking forward to the bands stationed throughout the course. As I made my way towards the start line, I could feel the excitement building. I finally made it to where my wave was to begin and realized that it would be many minutes before I would cross the start line, there was a literal sea of people in front of me. My main worry was that I wouldn’t finish. My second worry was that I would finish dead last. We heard the Star Spangled Banner, and anticipated the starting bell. Then we kind of shuffled forward until the crowd thinned out enough to begin to jog.

The cool morning air felt refreshing and I hoped that it would stay cool. I felt so good, partly due to training at altitude, and I had to remind myself not to start out too fast. The first few miles I began to list all the things that I was grateful for. A feeling of peace and joy filled me and I totally absorbed the moment. At mile ten, I remembered a story that Patty had told me about Kelly. Kelly had just gone through a stem cell transplant and was not able to leave the cancer ward. She had not been able to go out trick or treating for Halloween. “Let’s go reverse trick or treating!” Kelly grinned. She asked her mom to bring candy to the hospital. She went from bed to bed, to all the other children who could not get out to trick or treat, giving them candy and laughing the whole time. Patty said that it was such a blessing for Kelly to be able to give to those kids. I thought about the courage and joy that Kelly exhibited while on her cancer journey. “A marathon is nothing compared to that”, I thought. “You can do this!”

When we crossed the half marathon mat, I was shocked at my pace. I was doing so well! When I reached mile sixteen, I started to sing in my head “Happy Birthday To You” to celebrate Kelly’s sixteenth birthday. From then on, my mood was high and I seemed to just float through the mile markers. At mile twenty I started dancing to the band’s beat. I knew then that I would finish and I was infused with energy! I drew energy from the crowd, high fiving everyone I could. By mile 26 my hips were sore and I had the sensation that if I stopped walking, I would never walk again. I knew that it was almost over, but I strained to see the finish line. Then I saw my son, Adam and he ran up and gave me a big hug! Ross and Laura were there with big smiles, and I couldn’t believe that I was at the finish! This one’s for Kelly, I thought!

I finished my marathon in 6 hrs 09 minutes, which was better than I had ever believed I could do! I was very proud and also very humble. I said another prayer for Kelly and her family, and once again counted my blessings.

Tomorrow?

Do you know what you are going to do tomorrow? That was the question that our CYAR facilitator asked us last night. His point, of course, is that we THINK we know just what we will do tomorrow. We THINK we have it all planned out. When we really don't know. His point was that we can change what will happen tomorrow and do something different. Do something better.

This question had a totally different meaning to me. Ross's cousin had died over the weekend. His cousin that is just a handful of years older than Ross. His cousin that went to work that morning thinking he knew what he was going to do that day. His day was probably planned out to the smallest detail. Travel plans, work details, lunch plans, maybe even dinner plans. But, he never made it home. I just kept thinking about that during our talk. I think that if everyday we live TODAY like we really don't know what tomorrow will bring. Live like we might not make it back home the next night. Live like our loved ones might not make it home the next night. I wonder what that would look like? What would you say differently? What would you do differently? Something better? Something more meaningful?

Please pray for Jim Monahan's family, Pray for Aunt Joy and Uncle Jack, pray for Ross's Mom & Dad and all the rest of the family.

and I ask you, What does your tomorrow look like? What about Today? What about right now?